How To Plan the perfect SEXY Bachelorette or "Girl's Night Out" Party

How To Plan the perfect SEXY Bachelorette or "Girl's Night Out" Party

How To Plan the perfect SEXY Bachelorette or "Girl's Night Out" Party:

I work with brides daily and entertain them weekly.  I own and operate the Stiletto Gym and a large percentage of our party business is bachelorette parties.  After working with thousands of girls thought is necessary to give a few pointers on throwing the ultimate Sexy and Fun bachelorette party. 

Whenever I see large of groups of ladies come into my studio I often applaud them because there is  nothing like organizing five to twenty-five people you don’t exactly know, trying to figure out what dates they are free, what they’re willing to spend, and how ridiculous they’re willing to be. Add in the actual logistics of party planning, plus collecting cash money from people, and you have yourself a full-time job.

But the bottom line is bachelorette parties are fun and can be “semi-stress-free”, if you plan and have the right mindset.   They are one of the rare adult opportunities we get to get a bunch of our (girl) friends together, and just focus on having fun and each other. They allow us the opportunity for ridiculous over the top party planning and celebrating someone you love. They are generally worth all of the pain-in-the-ass emails and texts required to organize them.

So today I’m here to break down all of the tips and tricks that will make bachelorette party planning a little less painful and make the party a lot more fun.


The bachelorette party is are often planned by the maid of honor. But sometimes, that is not going to happen because the MOH isn’t much of a planner, or a busy mom, or working a few jobs. In which case, it’s perfectly reasonable for a bridesmaid or other friend to step in and offer to plan the party.  I would recommend the MOH may be “president” but it is important to have a “vice president”.    


The first and most critical step, is to figure out what people can afford. So before you invite everyone to a long weekend in Las Vegas, think about who you’re inviting. If you need to, send private emails to get the lowdown on what people’s individual budgets look like. While it can be awkward to ask for your friend’s financials, it’s less awkward than putting them in a position where they must tell you they can’t possibly pay for the party you’re throwing.  Most of the time everyone will be splitting the cost of the party, so plan in a way that makes it possible for your attendees to do just that.


In my studio I see many weekend get-a-ways as groups will travel to Kansas City and have a full weekend planned.  Keep in mind not everyone can afford a bachelorette weekend.   In reality, deciding between a night on the town and a weekend away generally comes down to location. Are the people you’re inviting generally located in one place? Then a night on the town is probably the simplest, most affordable bet. But if your people are located all over the place, and most people are going to be traveling, you might as well plan on making a weekend out of it.  I think that is why we see so many in our studio as I am located in Kansas City (smack in the middle of the Country) so it is easy to meet here.  And if everyone is going to need a place to stay, you might as well go full slumber party.  Rent a Airbnb or hotel in your City so it is still gets the feeling of being out of town. 


While the bride has lots on her plate, planning a wedding, it is still important to get some idea of who she would like to see at her celebration. Keep in mind that everyone you invite will not attend.  All my years of hosting parties, the one thing I know is that 20 RSVP’s really means 12-15 in attendance.  Just a side note, sometimes everyone does attend so be prepared. 


Once you have a potential guest list, it’s time to figure out the vibe of this party to be. Do you want twenty-five women out for a night on the town?  Dinner and bars, Or do you want five people doing the slumber party thing (face mask and champagne)? What does the bride want? How many people do you think will actually RSVP yes? If you’re planning to rent a house or Airbnb, does that limit the number of guests?  Do you want to plan a day of actives, pole dancing, winery, pedicures?


Bachelorette parties can happen anywhere between four months to one month before the wedding. In some cases, they may happen the weekend of the wedding, if that’s the only time a far-flung group of people will all be in town at the same time. (tip: If you have a party happening the weekend of the wedding, limit both drinking and staying out late, because a hangover at the altar is about as fun as it sounds.)

Picking the date means coordinating with the bride and the people that are most important to her on the guest list. Remember, the date won’t work for everyone and that is just a fact.  Please don’t stress over trying to accommodate everyone, it is impossible.  If possible, pick a date that will work for her three to four very best people.


Think about what the bride and her personality and try to come up with a fun theme/activity/outing that incorporates things she genuinely enjoys. That could be wine tasting, pole dancing, or just having a spa night.   I always think that something fun and sexy is great, even if it pushes the bride out of her comfort zone a bit. 

If you have a big group, and you want people to feel the bond, consider planning an activity that’s out of everyone’s comfort zone… but in a way they will enjoy.  I see women every weekend having fun and laughing even though it may have pushed them a bit from their comfort zone. 


This is a bachelorette party, so nothing needs to be super formal. Once you have a date picked, it’s wise to send out some sort of save the date via text or email. Creating a Facebook post or Evite is a convenient and easy way for you to collect RSVPs reasonably easily. (please know you may still need to bug people to get a response.)


Once the day/night/weekend is planned, letting the guests know what to expect is key to having a good time.  Design the basic itinerary and send it out via email. Let people know not just what is happening when, but also what the costs are and how they’re expected to pay. (Is it pay-your-own-way at the bar? Or Venmo the organizer? Do you need to bring cash?)

If you’re planning a weekend away, it’s not a bad idea to have hard copies of the schedule ready for everyone on arrival. People can refer to them throughout the weekend to know what to expect, and you won’t have to field a million questions about what’s next.


If you’re planning something longer than a night out, remember that the real joy of this party is getting friends from all walks of the bride’s life together and having a chance to hang out, away from the pressures of a wedding. (And for the older crowds, away from their families, kids, career, general life pressures.)  While it is tempting to plan an event and having every moment filled, remember to plan for downtime.

People will want to catch up, dip their feet in the pool, chat with friends they haven't seen for while, look at pictures. fill in the blank. And those quiet moments may just be the ones that you remember most fondly, not the drinking in access and not remembering what happened.


It’s fine to want a cute group photo in matching T-shirts, or those always awesome sun hats that has cute sayings.  But keep in mind your crowd’s budget and willingness to participate in dress-up shenanigans. If you really want that photo, try to pick one easy outfit or prop. (Be in Bride Tribe T-shirts or just dressing in all black and the bride in white).   Make it affordable or something they already have in their closets.


Once you have that cute photo, (we take a lot of cute photos in our studio) it’s going to be tempting to put it—and every other picture of the weekend—on social media. And that’s fine, if everyone in the photo is fine with it.  If you do post, make a cute hashtag.  Ask before you post!


This is one of the bridal events that really, really, really doesn’t need presents. pending the money and taking the time to show up is more than enough.  If people feel that they must bring a present suggest a lottery ticket, this way the money can be used at the party or for the wedding!


Frankie G

Stiletto Gym  "Book your party with us"!



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